I'm thinkin' like...

I feel like a Marvin Gaye song right now.
Out of place among the cowgirls.

Who makes ya money, uh-huh who makes ya money?

An adscreen popped up and told me if I smoke cigarettes I may qualify for a free electronic cigarette.  Free stuff's always good.  Another one told me I can really turn 97 dollars into 6797 dollars.  That would be SWELL.

And hell's belles.  I'm SORRY, truly, that I've been like... in my own little world and blowing people off again.. and seeming mysterious again.. it's just that I'm working my ass off and I've like found religion in the art and I can't, I can't, I just can't keep up with things and it's not that I don't know that they are... important.  I just.  I just.  

As We Roll On...

Another rehearsal, another unbelievably happy day.  As We Roll On.  With the same cast of characters.

I've been video-happy lately.  Cuz there's been a camera around.  But I'll be back to just blogging and cartoons now... For now...

Between the Lines

Rehearsal Time:  Happiest Time:  Song:  Between the Lines

-Take 2-

CAST (in order of appearance): 

SmartPhone................................................................................BleepBleepBleep

Me.....................................mysterious back of the head, on piano and mic (obv)

AP...............................................mysterious rhythmic shadowy figure, on drums

CM...............Mysterious Maestro, (OTS), on bass, mixing board, and steadycam

My Face.

Now this is what friends are for.... I feel less bonkers already.

Oh, wow, I'm not alone....

Bloody Mary for Grownups

Okay now this is what I call seriously fucking with oneself.  I don't know I got home tonight, and like, I've been seeing this guy Brandon for a little while now... irrelevant... well.. I'll catch up about that... he's been keeping me busy... rather, I've been keeping him busy.  And waiting.  A lot.  Cuz I'm finally getting my shit together with my music.  I really am.  It's incredible.  I have a band.  They're all amazing.  I just wanna do my stuff, and it sounds so good, and one of the guys knows the owner of this place, the Bluebird Cafe, and said... he might offer us a regular spot there... Gulp. I don't know.  Fingers crossed.  It's all coming together.  But.  Anyway.  

I feel kind of tripped out tonight.  Everything, just, Brandon, asking, so many questions about me, about my past, and old relationships, and, he didn't ask if I've ever been married... of course he didn't-- and like... I was looking in the mirror, after washing my face, and I'm seeing how many lives and how many souls and how many hearts and how many just NON-HUMAN, just BASE, ELEMENTS, inhabit this creature I am... it's not just Chloe in there... it's all my, my fire, my water, my SADNESS has a SPEAR, my GREED, my MENACE, my DEMONS, my DEVILS, my SECRETS, my broken flowers, my helpless and terrified id, my capricious and engulfing lust, and these animals, and the witches... that live in me.  

I'm not on drugs, mind you. WATCH FOR YOURSELF, and tell me you can't see it too... The cat, even, she was staring at me as I was sniveling there in the mirror and then she pounced at me that wasn't me, until I said I'm sorry I'm sorry and I started crying and then she stopped but she was looking around behind the toilet and stuff for whatever it was that she had just seen...

Just watch. 

Doesn't it make nice good background ambience?  Just Like.... the ideal Screensaver?  

Relaxing?  Like a painting in a motel room?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Girl's Night, Dressed to Impress

See.  I can have fun.  And I can have friends.  And I can look hot.

World, meet Sandy, my new friend.  Last night we fucking went out.  The woman knows how to go out.  I went to her place and she lent me clothes and we fucking WENT OUT.

I'd told Brandon I'd meet him at this bar (not the Rockstar) and I came with Sandy.  And I danced with Sandy all night.  In front of him.  And then I went home.  :::devilish laugh:::

But seriously.  Rehearsal in the morning.  Had to.